A Friend to the Lonely

Tamar’s Story (Genesis 38):

Tamar was stuck. Sent home to her father’s home, she hid in shame and rejection. A widow without a kinsman redeemer was cast aside, as she felt she had no place to belong.  Trapped in the results of Judah’s decision and cultural rules, she could not move.

Judah could have freed her from his family, allowing her to marry someone other than Judah’s son. However, this would have spelled public shame upon his family, so he sent her away instead.

Pushed to her breaking point, she laid a trap and Judah was caught. Driven to right a terrible wrong, Judah repented and married Tamar.

With Judah’s remorse, Tamar regained her life. Judah declared her actions righteous because of his unfulfilled promise. The Lord showed her mercy and pulled her from the mud to solid ground through this. (Read Genesis 38)

Inspired by Tamar, we can touch the lives of other women around us with the power of her redemptive story. As believers in Jesus, we are directed to take the healing we receive and share it with others. Our hurting world needs the healing love and acceptance of Jesus.

Candice (not her real name) works from home. Although she meets with colleagues virtually, she has little to no social interaction with them. After a recent relationship breakup, she felt abandoned and alone, her mind struggled with fear that life would always be this painful.

Her loss reminded me of the loss experienced by Tamar. However, Candice often talks with a more experienced woman who assures her the grief she feels will subside. Having a place to voice her innermost thoughts allows her to process her emotions. Not to the extent of Tamar but her loss is still real. 

Her older friend does not have all the answers, but she does share listening ears. In a noisy world sometimes all we need is someone to hear us. It allows us to be seen and validated. This combats the loneliness that has become commonplace in our society.

Candice’s relationship with this older woman does not change her circumstances. It does not restore her broken romantic relationship, nor does it take the ache of the loss from her. It does, however, remind her that she is not alone.

Her advocate encourages Candice and prays for her in a season when she finds it difficult to pray for herself. By extending a little of her time, she impacts Candice’s life. She became a conduit of God’s love to Candice. Her presence brought confidence into a lonely season.

Who do you know who is struggling right now? Many in younger generations suffer from loneliness. With more working from home, they have lost their community.

We all influence others around us on various levels, whether the relationship is casual, acquaintance, or intimate friend. Impacting others depends on our willingness to interact with them.

Pray for God’s love to come through you. Look to love on a stranger today. Share a smile, a kind word, put away their grocery cart, leave a big tip, or even a small gift. Have fun with it and do it in a way that fits your God-given personality.

For those you may know a little better, take the time to say hello and call them by name. Ask “How are you?” and listen to their answer. Offer to pray for them and pray right there if they are comfortable with that. Give them a safe place to invite you into their difficult circumstances. How different would Tamar’s life be if someone cared for her this way?

Let’s pray: Dear Jesus, thank you for inviting me into your family. I’m so glad my adoption is permanent. So many in our society are struggling with loneliness, which can develop into feeling abandoned. Please help us see the people around us to share life with them. Give us wisdom, bringing your love to those who need you. In Jesus Name Amen.